Thank you to everyone out there who sent me well wishes or just thought positive, happy things for me. It truly means the world and I know that I would not have my positive beta without your support. And I'm sorry I've been slow to update this week. I've just been sooo tired every night after work. But I managed to have a small burst of energy so here's part one of my happy beta story. : )
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Where to begin? I guess I'll just start with the morning of Sunday, October 7th - beta day for my first FET. The morning is a bit of a blur until the part where I received the phone call from my RE that changed my life forever. Nothing before that seems to even matter, but just so I can look back and reflect on the day, I'll write about it anyway...as best as I can remember.
I woke up bright and early Sunday morning so I could shower and get myself ready before my blood draw. I was beginning to rethink taking the earliest time slot they had available on the weekend. I was so tired but I just wanted to get it over with; I was convinced it was going to be negative. So with one day's notice, I took the 8:40 am appointment.
As it crept past 8:00, my hubby gently suggested that I needed to get going to allow extra time for the marathon that was happening that morning. I thought he was probably right so I left...and it turned out he was wrong! Ha ha! I hate to admit this, but my hubby is usually right about things so I rather enjoy it when he isn't. ; )
I didn't see a single marathoner or closed street on the drive to my clinic so I arrived around 8:30 - plenty of time. I checked in at the front desk and didn't even get to take a seat in the waiting room. The tech was behind the front desk and was ready for me. It must have been a slow morning. She took me back to the usual seat by the window that overlooked the street below. I pulled up the sleeve on my left arm and she said something about "We're doing the left arm today?" I think she was trying to be funny since it was obvious I wanted her to use my left arm but her delivery needed a little work. And I wasn't in the mood for jokes...at least not jokes that weren't very good.
She asked for my date of birth, then I felt the familiar pinch of the needle. Since the weekend tech is a different person than who is on staff during the week, it didn't hurt at all. It only took a few seconds and my blood was bottled (well, tubed) and labeled. I asked her when I would be getting the results and she said they usually call after 12 pm. I thanked her and put pressure on my arm as I walked out the door. I was in and out of the clinic in two minutes.
I arrived home again just a few minutes after 9 am and thought to myself it was too late to make it to the early church service, which started at 9 am. I don't like walking into church that late, and by the time I drove there, it would be much more after 9. I can't remember exactly what I did between getting home from my blood draw and leaving for the later church service. Maybe I did some laundry and watched a little TV?
DH and I left around 10:15 am for the 10:30 church service. After we arrived, I said to DH that we should sit in the back by the door in case my RE called during the service. So we sat in the very last row next to the doors leading to the large gathering / lobby type space (I'm not sure if this area in a church has a specific name - narthex, maybe?). Our church services last about an hour, and throughout our time there, I kept thinking about the pros and cons of being given the news of a positive blood test or a negative blood test during church.
As the service was creeping to a close, I thought we were in the clear. Then my phone rang. At exactly 11:19 am. My heart jumped into my throat and I raced out the back door. Even though I was sure the test was going to be negative I still didn't want to miss the call and have to try to reach my clinic later. Now was not the time for a game of phone tag. My RE was on the line. "Oh no," I thought, "Doesn't he only call with bad news? Don't the nurses call with good news?" I really had no idea, but based on other blogs I've read, this was my conclusion. And even though I thought the result was going to be negative, I was still holding onto that last bit of hope.
And then he said to me, "I have some good news." I said, "What?" My mind was racing; my first thought was he was joking. Even though I knew a doctor wouldn't joke about something like that, I was still convinced that's what was happening. Then I wondered what the catch was; he has good news BUT....but what? The "but" never came and I still didn't believe him. I thought he was going to tell me the good news is this cycle failed, but we can get started with (fill in the blank) for the next cycle.
I literally did not believe the words that were coming out of this man's mouth. He continued talking and said my test was positive and he congratulated me, and somewhere in there, it sunk in and I said "Oh my God, really?" And I just broke down. I felt a huge wave of relief and I started sobbing. There was no holding back. I couldn't believe it. Me? Pregnant? Positive pregnancy tests don't happen to me; they're for other people.
My RE laughed a little at my sobbing but it was a good laugh, a happy laugh at my surprise and joy. He ran down the list of next steps, which I was barely comprehending at that point. I heard him say something about coming back again on Tuesday, October 9th for a second hCG blood test to confirm my levels were rising properly, to schedule our first fetal u/s, and to continue taking my PIO, Estrace, baby aspirin, and prenatal vitamins. I finally gathered my wits enough to ask if the clinic would be calling me to schedule or if I should be the one to call them. He said I should call. I thanked him and then I hung up. The call lasted 1 minute and 24 seconds. And it completely changed my life.
I walked very quickly back to the church sanctuary to tell DH the news. And I let the tears continue. I was just so happy! I sat down next to DH and leaned over to rest my chin on his shoulder and whispered to him, "it was positive!" And I sobbed some more. He smiled at me and squeezed my hand. He whispered back to me and asked if I wanted to leave church. I said no, and had to quickly regain my composure for communion by intinction. I'm sure I had red, splotchy eyes as I received the communion wafer from the pastor and dipped it in...juice! For the first time, I had a real reason for not using the wine! And it felt really good.
The last few minutes of church seemed to take an eternity. Again DH asked if I wanted to leave. This time I said yes so we snuck out during the closing hymn. I realized as we were walking to the car that I still did not have any Estrace to take on Monday since I would be taking my last dose Sunday night. DH and I were also planning to go to the apple orchard after church with my sister and my nephew. So I quick gave my sister a call to tell her we were on our way home, which was good since she was already on her way to our house to pick us up. Then I called my RE about my Estrace problem, but the clinic was already closed. "What? By 11:30 am?" I thought. So I held for the answering service. I explained my situation to the nice, non-medically trained man who answered the phone. After some discussion, he said he wasn't allowed to page a doctor unless it was an emergency. I told him I thought it was an emergency since I didn't have the medication I needed. He agreed to put in the page and said if I didn't hear from Dr. C (my RE) within 20 minutes, that I should call back again. Dr. C called nine minutes later. He is awesome.
I apologized for not thinking to ask about the Estrace when he called me the first time. Then we discussed that since I have ordered all of my meds over the phone to be mailed to me overnight, that he would call in a prescription for me to a local pharmacy for just a few pills to hold me over until I could refill my regular prescription with the mail order service. Sounded like a plan to me!![]()
*********************
Where to begin? I guess I'll just start with the morning of Sunday, October 7th - beta day for my first FET. The morning is a bit of a blur until the part where I received the phone call from my RE that changed my life forever. Nothing before that seems to even matter, but just so I can look back and reflect on the day, I'll write about it anyway...as best as I can remember.
I woke up bright and early Sunday morning so I could shower and get myself ready before my blood draw. I was beginning to rethink taking the earliest time slot they had available on the weekend. I was so tired but I just wanted to get it over with; I was convinced it was going to be negative. So with one day's notice, I took the 8:40 am appointment.
As it crept past 8:00, my hubby gently suggested that I needed to get going to allow extra time for the marathon that was happening that morning. I thought he was probably right so I left...and it turned out he was wrong! Ha ha! I hate to admit this, but my hubby is usually right about things so I rather enjoy it when he isn't. ; )
I didn't see a single marathoner or closed street on the drive to my clinic so I arrived around 8:30 - plenty of time. I checked in at the front desk and didn't even get to take a seat in the waiting room. The tech was behind the front desk and was ready for me. It must have been a slow morning. She took me back to the usual seat by the window that overlooked the street below. I pulled up the sleeve on my left arm and she said something about "We're doing the left arm today?" I think she was trying to be funny since it was obvious I wanted her to use my left arm but her delivery needed a little work. And I wasn't in the mood for jokes...at least not jokes that weren't very good.
She asked for my date of birth, then I felt the familiar pinch of the needle. Since the weekend tech is a different person than who is on staff during the week, it didn't hurt at all. It only took a few seconds and my blood was bottled (well, tubed) and labeled. I asked her when I would be getting the results and she said they usually call after 12 pm. I thanked her and put pressure on my arm as I walked out the door. I was in and out of the clinic in two minutes.
I arrived home again just a few minutes after 9 am and thought to myself it was too late to make it to the early church service, which started at 9 am. I don't like walking into church that late, and by the time I drove there, it would be much more after 9. I can't remember exactly what I did between getting home from my blood draw and leaving for the later church service. Maybe I did some laundry and watched a little TV?
DH and I left around 10:15 am for the 10:30 church service. After we arrived, I said to DH that we should sit in the back by the door in case my RE called during the service. So we sat in the very last row next to the doors leading to the large gathering / lobby type space (I'm not sure if this area in a church has a specific name - narthex, maybe?). Our church services last about an hour, and throughout our time there, I kept thinking about the pros and cons of being given the news of a positive blood test or a negative blood test during church.
As the service was creeping to a close, I thought we were in the clear. Then my phone rang. At exactly 11:19 am. My heart jumped into my throat and I raced out the back door. Even though I was sure the test was going to be negative I still didn't want to miss the call and have to try to reach my clinic later. Now was not the time for a game of phone tag. My RE was on the line. "Oh no," I thought, "Doesn't he only call with bad news? Don't the nurses call with good news?" I really had no idea, but based on other blogs I've read, this was my conclusion. And even though I thought the result was going to be negative, I was still holding onto that last bit of hope.
And then he said to me, "I have some good news." I said, "What?" My mind was racing; my first thought was he was joking. Even though I knew a doctor wouldn't joke about something like that, I was still convinced that's what was happening. Then I wondered what the catch was; he has good news BUT....but what? The "but" never came and I still didn't believe him. I thought he was going to tell me the good news is this cycle failed, but we can get started with (fill in the blank) for the next cycle.
I literally did not believe the words that were coming out of this man's mouth. He continued talking and said my test was positive and he congratulated me, and somewhere in there, it sunk in and I said "Oh my God, really?" And I just broke down. I felt a huge wave of relief and I started sobbing. There was no holding back. I couldn't believe it. Me? Pregnant? Positive pregnancy tests don't happen to me; they're for other people.
My RE laughed a little at my sobbing but it was a good laugh, a happy laugh at my surprise and joy. He ran down the list of next steps, which I was barely comprehending at that point. I heard him say something about coming back again on Tuesday, October 9th for a second hCG blood test to confirm my levels were rising properly, to schedule our first fetal u/s, and to continue taking my PIO, Estrace, baby aspirin, and prenatal vitamins. I finally gathered my wits enough to ask if the clinic would be calling me to schedule or if I should be the one to call them. He said I should call. I thanked him and then I hung up. The call lasted 1 minute and 24 seconds. And it completely changed my life.
I walked very quickly back to the church sanctuary to tell DH the news. And I let the tears continue. I was just so happy! I sat down next to DH and leaned over to rest my chin on his shoulder and whispered to him, "it was positive!" And I sobbed some more. He smiled at me and squeezed my hand. He whispered back to me and asked if I wanted to leave church. I said no, and had to quickly regain my composure for communion by intinction. I'm sure I had red, splotchy eyes as I received the communion wafer from the pastor and dipped it in...juice! For the first time, I had a real reason for not using the wine! And it felt really good.
The last few minutes of church seemed to take an eternity. Again DH asked if I wanted to leave. This time I said yes so we snuck out during the closing hymn. I realized as we were walking to the car that I still did not have any Estrace to take on Monday since I would be taking my last dose Sunday night. DH and I were also planning to go to the apple orchard after church with my sister and my nephew. So I quick gave my sister a call to tell her we were on our way home, which was good since she was already on her way to our house to pick us up. Then I called my RE about my Estrace problem, but the clinic was already closed. "What? By 11:30 am?" I thought. So I held for the answering service. I explained my situation to the nice, non-medically trained man who answered the phone. After some discussion, he said he wasn't allowed to page a doctor unless it was an emergency. I told him I thought it was an emergency since I didn't have the medication I needed. He agreed to put in the page and said if I didn't hear from Dr. C (my RE) within 20 minutes, that I should call back again. Dr. C called nine minutes later. He is awesome.
I apologized for not thinking to ask about the Estrace when he called me the first time. Then we discussed that since I have ordered all of my meds over the phone to be mailed to me overnight, that he would call in a prescription for me to a local pharmacy for just a few pills to hold me over until I could refill my regular prescription with the mail order service. Sounded like a plan to me!
